Description: There are plenty of beautiful things about dating! Otherwise, we wouldn’t do it, right?! But there are situations when things don’t go that well. It can be really disturbing. Fortunately, some signs can help us recognize the problem before it appears!
We remember a friend once told us he wouldn’t go back to the age when he was always dating! But what is the age of dating?
Indeed, we can date at any age! But as you know we are doing it, much more when we are younger.
We have to admit that it confused us. For us, dating was fun. And of course, it’s wonderful when you click with someone and start a relationship. A new relationship can make you feel like you are in heaven. But then we began to think about some previous dates and even relationships we had. And suddenly it seemed like the clouds in our brain are clearing and we understood that we are romanticizing things way more than we should.
We realized that this heavenly sensation the relationship brings can cloud our judgment and prevent us from seeing things how they are. For example, your new lover can have a list of negative behaviors that are obvious to everyone but you, since you are madly in love. These behaviors can express some untreatable personality disorders such as anti social behavior.
Fortunately, there are red flags that can signal when there is a problem. These are signs that you would generally see in your friend’s new lover but you are blind when they appear in your relationship. But keep in mind that they must not be ignored because they can turn your life into a nightmare.
And the more you let things evolve, the harder and more painful things will become. The good thing is that these dating red flags highlight the behaviour so you can know when to end before things go too far. And it doesn’t matter whether we are talking about IRL or online dating. In this text, you are going to learn how to identify these signals and react before you have to take short term loans to rent the joint apartment, etc.
What Are Red Flags in Dating
As we already mentioned, by dating red flags definition we mean all those things that can signal that there is a problem. But hearing about the existence of these alarms can make you worried and you might start looking for them everywhere. It’s essential to know that not everything poses a problem. That’s why we are going to list some problematic things so you should know and what to do if they appear during the date or later in the relationship.
Moves too Fast
We remember one of our friends started dating a colleague. The relationship seemed perfect at first. But after several weeks he started to express the desire to meet her parents. She was under the impression that they are just hanging around together and this request seemed like too much too soon. However, seeing that it was really important to him she gave in and introduced him to her parents at her mother’s birthday party. But he didn’t stop there! The next thing she knew, he was talking about getting married and having children. This was a signal for her to get out of this relationship.
The thing is that in the first weeks, and sometimes months, we are only getting to know each other. And not only that. We are trying to impress the other person, so we show only the best of ourselves. Our dating advice is to keep your eyes open. This way you can notice problematic things. If someone is moving too fast, that can indicate that they are desperate or have some deep secrets.
Makes You Think of Doctor Jekyll and Mister Hyde
A guy you met on one of the dating websites is the gentlest person in your life. He sends you romantic messages, cares you softly, pays attention to every one of your feelings, etc. In other words, he is so splendid that you sometimes wonder, if he’s real. But then he starts screaming at the waiter because the soups are not warm enough or something like that. Keep in mind that this can be a sign that he has anger issues that have no place in mature dating. If you are with someone angry all the time for little things you shouldn’t dismiss it.
It is the characteristic for violent, men to be like that, and they always find an excuse for their behavior. The best thing is to get to know someone before things get serious. If you discover that he had a problematic past or childhood, and grew up with violent parents, watch for warning signs. If you notice that he is continually angry without apparent reason, it is best to break up regardless of how sweet he may seem.
Doesn’t Have Personal Life
In other words, if he is too clingy, leave him without thinking twice. What do we mean by too clingy? Well, if it seems he doesn’t have life and friends out of your relationship and he always wants to be with you only, then he is too clingy.
Talking about dating pros and cons, it is essential to say that a symbiotic relationship is one of the negative things that can appear. Personal time is super important and taking some to spend with your friends doesn’t mean you love your partner less.
Makes the Racial Comments
Okay, this is something typical only for interracial dating. As you know, one of the good things about dating apps and dating websites is that we can meet someone from another country. Sometimes the person’s skin color is not the same as ours. Now in many situations, this doesn’t pose a problem. But sometimes a guy can tell you that you are nothing like the people of your race. Or that you are, a lot like people of his race. While it is made to sound like a compliment, it is a red flag for racial intolerance.
Unlike our friend from the beginning of this story, despite everything we know about it, we still think dating is nice! Something is thrilling about all those preparations when before going out and actual date. But you always should be careful. It’s necessary to be super attentive and notice problematic behaviors in time! What are your experiences? Are you able to notice the warning signs? What signs do you know?
Jade is a finance analyst and has been involved in many successful business projects with a range of companies throughout the country. She started writing 3 years ago and enjoys researching, discussing, and writing on the topics of finances, budgeting, money advice, lifestyle and wellness.
Jade loves to spend time with her family and has a lot of hobbies including hiking, riding a bike, cooking and traveling.